icelandic railways choir boys: anta odeli uta

do sheep dream of wooly androids?

big wind: fit

A series of variations on the children's poem, "Who Has Seen the Wind?"

the universe circus sugar band: famous album cover

asphalt jasper: metal sunshine

metal sunshine

when the rain turns
to bat and butterfly
bleating lamb and
monster in the moat

handed men: dirty tricks

Hey all you handed men fans, the long-awaited lyrics to "Mr. Diddle Do" are here. Get your chant on:

Mr. Diddle do no work for FBI,
But he on you like a spy.

Mr. Diddle do nothing good,
But still you shouldn't lie.

Mr. Diddle do your face,
And you prefer it soon erased.

Mr. Diddle do no acquital,
And you must go without.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,
Mr. Diddle do Mr. Diddle do.

And there're also new versions of "pop kids pop" and "grinder monkey grinder," but you'll love "shoelace escape."

BIGFOOT MEETS INDUSTRIAL ORANGE

This album has so many urban legends associated with it that people forget that BIGFOOT is a rural legend. Mistakes abound. Too many mistakes. Time for some correcting.

This album does not have a version of the "Uga-Chuga" song on it. No one from Doctor Hook and the Medicine Show performed on this album. (Whether or not Slash of Guns N' Roses fame modeled his look on Dr. Hook isn't a question to be answered here.)There is a song on this album entitled "Run Away," but it's not to be confused "Runaway Sister" or "Sister Runaway"--if, indeed, there are actually songs with those titles.

When it first hit the market, this album was most famous for a hootenanny called "Shredded on the Trotline When Melvin Gunned the Boat Engine," a song that received a lot of radio play. Personally, the song grossed me out--"Give my liver to fish," yuck!

But critics have returned to this album for something called wavesonic present in such tracks as "Chainsaw Fiddler," "Clucked the Robot Chicken," and "Get the Dodge Out of Hell."

In other words, there's evidence on this album that rural thrash does exist "In a drainpipe with a tin awning."

But wait! If you think BIGFOOT is reason enough that you might risk your life by running away from the Walking Boss, you'll love the cover tune, "BIGFOOT MEETS INDUSTRIAL ORANGE":

Down the highway in your orange PJs, picking up trash,
When along comes BIGFOOT, holy shit! When along comes BIGFOOT!
Run now Industrial Orange, what are the bloodhounds going to do?
Don't stop for the Walking Boss, even if he threatens to shoot you.

Yes, BIGFOOT's nasty big. Get it running in your collection.

music for funeral homes: heaven's toilet

What could be more comforting to the deceased's loved ones than music from heaven? The sound of the lyre, the sound of the brook, the twitter of birds at sunrise? Look no further than heaven's toilet as my plumber friend, Ren Chimer, used to say. And here it is from music for funeral homes: heaven's toilet.

Anticipate the majesty of the final flush.

molotova: monstruomistress

"dollface celestially, autunite pratique" (barnaul tribune)

...from siberia weeth luv...

minty fresh zombie

When you're getting a bite taken out of your neck or out of your frontal lobe or out of your belly, do you really want to have to vomit in your mouth? I don't think so. You'd rather your zombie had minty fresh breath, not the usual maggot mucus stench that reeks unto death.

Well, be sure to buy this album, which comes with a lifetime/lifelesstime zombie bite guarantee of minty fresh breath. Even if you don't like tunes such as "that my tooth" and "aching tango," you'll at least be able to fend off a corpse-chomping zombie with the "no bad breath" sticker contained herein.

Just stay away from the zombie dentist office.

suicide clown

Get up, my hair like a dog,
Roll over,
I've slept through another job.

My mother was 123.

My father, 456.

They didn't expect me

To get away.

I've learned another trick.

Who owns the sofa?

Circle around the block.

the p.u.r.r.r.s. - hold the tiger

rymas quebbeman and his fiery combo are ready to sink their sonic jaws into your - so tasty - throbbing gristles... the avengers of rock'n'roll garage are back!

Hobnail Ballet: Spiked

After several solo escapades of the band members, Hobnail Ballet announced their long awaited new studio release. 'Spiked' explores an eclectic diversity of styles and genres ranging from quirky urban techno to voluptuous jazz to haunting covers of international megahits. The group's trademark - obscure ancient and ethnic instruments woven with silken vocals and irrestistable percussion - returns. Only now the group incorporates even more diverse instruments, including automobile parts, animal bones, recycled wine bottles, and the African Kora, an ancient form of instrument with 21 strings.

Infused with an infectious offbeat optimism, these tracks break new ground in fracturing urban rhythms, surpassing even the rhythmic diversity of their debut album, 'Graceless Angels' and compelling the listener to motion, to dance. How will the band translate these beats in their newly announced live performances? Fans and critics alike are 'spiked' with anticipation.

----
Steve Wing & Dorothee Lang

The Lucróticos: MINIMISMO

Wallace Franklin: Me and My Tribe

Best known for its ability to militarize nature, Wallace Franklin has returned to the music scene with Me and My Tribe. Wallace Franklin classics such as "Geese in Missing Man Formation," "Alpha Foxtrot Vector," "Mop Up with Sparrows," and "Log Moss for Breakfast" are here with all new versions. But if you are a Wallace Franklin fan, you will love new the new tunes, especially "Deer Disguise" and "Eagle Dawn Dawn." And yes, all the tunes have the patented Wallace Franklin owl hoot. You'll love this album.

Kill Granny: Medicate Me

Washington D.C. alternative rock band Kill Granny has just
released their latest album Medicate Me. Having recently been
fired by their label, U.S.A. Productions, the album was
self-produced on a very limited budget and recorded in a small
studio in the D.C. area.

Sadly, Kill Granny's limited resources are quite evident on this
album. The tracks are cliche and transparent. The music is
uninspired and seems to have been borrowed from previous
recordings.

It seems that Kill Granny's stock in trade of attempting to shock
their audience has become far too predictable. This is an album
that nobody is buying.

Whisker: Mister Bob

Don't tell the neighbors I'm home
Don't tell anyone

nicolette: Nicolette Unscrubbed

Featuring three smash hits--"Damn It, I Spilled Again," "That's My T-Shirt," and "You Jerk"--Nicolette Unscrubbed has more treasure in store for tune hunters than all of Treasure Island. There's "Who's Your Pretty Princess Now?", "Bend Over So I Can Kick Your Ass," and "What Warrant?" But there's more: there's "Take the Trash Out When You Leave" and "I Ain't Your Momma, Loser" and "Love Me Get Out." And more!

You can bet Nicolette gives "found art" a whole new musical meaning when she empties out her kitchen cabinets in "Looking." And she proves just as adroit with a set of kitchen silverware as she is with a guitar. It's music from murderer's row the likes of which we haven't heard in some time.

Roll over Janis Joplin. Rock and roll it out!

Fire Island Jam - The Last Boys of Summer '79

Recorded during the glory days of the Gay Liberation Movement,
Fire Island Jam's The Last Boys of Summer '79 is a forgotten disco
classic.

With covers of songs like Thelma Houston's "Saturday Night, Sunday
Morning," Sister Sledge's "He's the Greatest Dancer," and Earth,
Wind, and Fire's "September," Fire Island Jam were on their way to
becoming the hottest gay disco cover band in the United States.

Sadly, The Last Boys of Summer '79 was the last album recorded by
the group. Lead singer Dinah Cancer left to pursue a career in New
York City politics and they soon lost their contract with Camp
Records.

The remaining members were quickly resigned by K-Tel, but the
label wanted them to change their image in order to be more
marketable to mainstream consumers. The band refused to "go back
into the closet" and after a bitter contract dispute with K-Tel
they lost the right to use the band name.

blue spice: hot flash

I'm old, I'm young
My face is melting

There's a sweat line
Beading on my lip

Quick--I need a sip
Of your cold chiller

Careful cause that
Pepper can kill you

I'm old, I'm young
My face is melting

Careful cause that
Pepper can kill you

homemade candy: big sugar

homemade candy is back with big sugar, and it's sweet, too, too sweet. There's "bucket of sugar," "sugar box," "sugar shaker," and "sugar shift." There's "pure cane," "beet it," and "stirring molasses." There's "adrift in powder," "puckery," "sweet tea kisses," and "sour lip lemonade." "There's "candy thermometer," "hot formed," "molten sweetness," "sculpted syrup," and "stirring."

Rumor has it that the organ grinder died during studio production, but whatever the case, homemade candy has cooked up another carnival of delight.